By Gary Cohen on September 27th, 2011

When elephants fight, who suffers?

When elephants fight When owners and executives fight like elephants for control and competing mental models of what is “right,” their blood pressure rises and they get so consumed with their personal and/or political conflict that they lose sight of collateral damage. They stomp and charge because it feels like they’re fighting for their lives and the life of the organization.

Meanwhile, it’s the grass that gets trampled. Coworkers and customers, in other words–if they happen to be in the way.

When elephants fight, coworkers and customers watching are left awestruck and anxious. They may even be drawn into the fight. As a result, the effects can be long-lasting.

When you feel your blood pressure rise and a fight brewing, close your door or leave the premises. Protect your coworkers and customers. The fight might be inevitable, but the collateral damage isn’t.

About the Author

Gary Cohen is a highly-skilled Executive Coach, Leadership Author, Trainer, and International Keynote Speaker. His clients range from entrepreneurial CEOs of the nation’s fastest-growing companies to executives of global 100 companies. He differentiates himself from traditional (psycho/therapeutic) executive coaches by bringing a vast amount of business experience as a former Founder / President of one the Nation’s Fastest growing companies. He is the author of Just Ask Leadership: Why Great Managers Always Ask the Right Questions (McGraw Hill). Gary B. Cohen Full Bio

Leading Self • Relationship at Work Communications, conflict

Dave Needham

Gary,

While I agree with your message I think the advice is a very temporary avoidance of the issue or are you speaking metaphors? The grass gets trampled because it is the foundation on which the elephants stand…not because it has the option to be there. I curious about what happens to the grass or what the grass can do to alleviate the pain associated with getting trampled. Avoidance or disappearance is not always an option when the elephants fight for more than a few hours.
- http://co2partners.com/blog Gary B Cohen
  
  Dave,
  
  Great observation and one of the issues with metaphors. Can’t live with or without them. Sadly and I think wrongfully the kids get drawn into these fights when the leadership should work it out especially when it is not operationally driven. I am not saying that real issues that involve others should be hidden. That would certainly be counter productive, I agree. I often see peers in organizations going at it be it business partners or organizational equals and many get hurt by the fighting and those fighting do little to think of the implications of the fight on their respective team or teams. Thoughts?
- http://co2partners.com/blog Gary B Cohen
  
  Dave,
  
  Great observation and one of the issues with metaphors. Can’t live with or without them. Sadly and I think wrongfully the kids get drawn into these fights when the leadership should work it out especially when it is not operationally driven. I am not saying that real issues that involve others should be hidden. That would certainly be counter productive, I agree. I often see peers in organizations going at it be it business partners or organizational equals and many get hurt by the fighting and those fighting do little to think of the implications of the fight on their respective team or teams. Thoughts?
http://www.careermanagementresources.com/ Rick

The obvious key to these confrontations as you point out is “they get so consumed with their personal and/or political conflict”. One of the most important aspects of managing conflicts or confrontations is being able to remove the “emotional drama” from the situation. Once you do that and step back from the situation, the issues and solutions become much clearer.
http://co2partners.com/blog Gary B Cohen

Thanks! It was a fun one to write and easy to remember.

When elephants fight, who suffers?

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